California: Endless Supply of College Republicans

Since the Republican Party has fallen into the minority, a power struggle within their ranks has ensued from the high levels at the House and Senate as well as the very bottom of the food chain, the College Republicans. With the prospect of wiping the slate clean, new up-and-comers have entered the fray to repeat the same phrases older generations have heard for decades.

Take for instance Adam Ellison (right side w/blond hair and glasses). Although he's taken down his "Path to the Presidency" on his Myspace page, Mr. Ellison knows to take small steps towards his goal of becoming POTUS.

After careful consideration, I have decided to declare myself a candidate for Chairman of the California College Republicans. I am honored to be accompanied by a team whose leadership and action in the College Republicans might only be matched by their dedication to the Conservative cause. It begins here; it begins now. California must rise and become a red state once again.

Mr. Ellison's resumé is impressive. For the past 4+ years he's worked as a bank teller at Bank of America, the corporation that gladly took $45 billion in a tax payer funded bailout cash and then threw a Super Bowl party as a 'thank you' to the public. Mr. Ellison is said to be competent at depositing rolls of quarters and he's hopeful he'll one day be trusted with paper money.

He has intentions of receiving an MBA after graduation with a focus on private wealth management. We applaud Mr. Ellison on his impeccable timing as no one seems to have much money in today's economy.

Mr. Ellison is also media savvy. He's established a Facebook page to help organize the right-leaning youth of our country (HA! Take that Leigh Wolf!)

We are excited to bring to you a FRESH approach to College Republican leadership in California. As Republicans we are, of course, concerned with the direction of the national party and our nation, but also with the future of the California Republican vision. Such a vision requires a grassroots base in order to carry forth the message that we remain committed to the principles that bound us under President Ronald Reagan. Those same principles of fiscal responsibility, smarter and smaller government, and free market economics are facing opposition today, even within our own party.

But let's forget about all this intellectual-techie-new media nonsense and focus on what's most important: Mr. Ellison likes guns, wearing flag pins on his lapel, and having his picture taken with Our Country's Flag as a show of patriotism. OYE asked him if he'd consider enlisting, so he could wear an American Flag on his clothing at all times, learn real leadership, and carry a gun to work, but his lack of a response appeared to be a signal that serving is for 'other people'.

Another item on his Facebook page stood out to us:

SPEAK OUT to us and let us hear what you think needs a do-over, a reformation, an expansion, and/or an improvement.

Whelp, if you have an suggestions for Mr. Ellison he can be reached here.