Monday, July 11, 2005

REPORTING FOR DUTY, SIR!

f

During the long and horrible Vietnam war, I tried to recruit flag waving right wingers. To a man, they refused. No matter what I offered them, "There is cheap pot to smoke! Lots of cheap prostitutes! You can kill people!" they had an amazing number of excuses like, "I have a boil on my ass."

Watching boastful men deflate is amusing but also annoying since they could puff up again the minute they left me behind as they ran away.

We didn't have the internet to track these cowards and keep the spotlight on them. Now we can coordinate this action, our patriotic duty is to find all males between the ages of 18 and 65 and urge them, if they support Bush, to really support him. I suppose we will earn the Medal of Freedom this way!

Many right wing women need to join, too. Since they are indifferent concerning the single mothers and married women with children who have already died in Iraq, we must remind them that raising a family is no barrier to going to Iraq to be blown up. They have a patriotic duty to ship the kids to grandma and go. The orphans will get nice American flags in return, one they can be proud of forever.

From the NYT:
The number of Reserve and National Guard troops on domestic and overseas missions has fallen to about 138,000, down from a peak of nearly 220,000 after the invasion of Iraq two years ago, a sharp decline that military officials say will continue in the months ahead.
Looks like our AWOL leader is bringing back the part time troops because of unrest in the ranks. Only 138,000 part timers are working full time now. Isn't that a great thing?

Alas, this isn't due to great victories but due to simple expedience. After getting our hands snapped off in war, we are withdrawing while declaring the usual "Victory with honor" despite the fact that this series of wars was supposed to stop terrorist attacks here at home.

This is a queer week to declare victory and run.
Reserve and National Guard members from all of the armed services make up about 35 percent of the troops in Iraq, a share that is expected to drop to about 30 percent by next year; the vast majority are from the Army Reserve and Army National Guard.

But as these returning troops settle back into their civilian lives, the Army is running perilously low on its Reserve and National Guard soldiers who largely fill certain critical support jobs, like military police and civil affairs officers and truck drivers. Marine Corps reservists are facing similar constraints.

A main reason for the shortages is that more and more of these troops who have been involuntarily mobilized are nearing their 24-month maximum call-up limit set by the Bush administration, military personnel specialists say.

The Army says it has found ways to handle the dwindling pool of reservists eligible to fill the support jobs, but some members of Congress, senior retired Army officers and federal investigators are less sanguine, warning that barring a reduction in the Pentagon's requirement to supply 160,000 forces in Iraq and Afghanistan, or a change in its mobilization policy, the Army will exhaust the supply of soldiers in critical specialties.
Well, what are the critical specialties? Maybe we can recruit all those business school majors and budding lawyers and divinity school kids and ship them over. The Young Republicans should list these specialties and urge members to study these fields so they can honor their Great AWOL Leader and be ready to fight for freedom and the American SUV.
To fill the pivotal support jobs for deployments to Iraq, Army and Pentagon planners are increasingly turning to the Navy and Air Force to provide truck drivers and security personnel. They are relying on more Army reservists to volunteer for extended duty, hiring more private contractors and accelerating the retraining of thousands of soldiers who had been essential to the cold war, like artillerymen, to be civil affairs and military intelligence troops needed for counterinsurgency operations.
Our dear young Repubs want low taxes. Hiring contractors who charge the same per month as a regular soldier gets paid per year is sheer insanity.

We can remind our dear Repub youth that volunteering to fight cheap will save mommy and daddy a ton of future taxes!

Join now! Cheap wars means low taxes!

10 Comments:

At 11 July, 2005 09:22, Blogger BlondeSense Liz said...

What's also unsettling is that since the NG sign ups are slacking off because the people who would normally sign up to defend our country are not interested in going to Iraq to fight a bogus war... what happens when we get attacked here in the US? Who is here to defend us and help out after a disaster?

Oh I believe that young war supporters ought to get their asses over there and fight for "my freedom".

-Liz

 
At 11 July, 2005 09:35, Blogger Sgt EdBeckmann RET said...

My inner frenchie has force my id to come up with a possible alternate theme for OYE.
Here goes...
Why aren't you fighting over there so we don't have to fight over here"
What do you think?

 
At 11 July, 2005 10:03, Anonymous StealthBadger said...

Bush may be trying to put OYE out of a job.

http://www.alertnet.org/thenews/newsdesk/L09407645.htm

via Juan Cole's post at Informed Comment:
http://www.juancole.com/2005/07/22-killed-in-iraq-guerrilla-violence.html

Anyone have any confirmation of this?

 
At 11 July, 2005 10:09, Anonymous StealthBadger said...

Heh. Oops, should have done this first. Some confirmation can be found by googling defence memo 2006 reduce iraq.

 
At 11 July, 2005 10:38, Anonymous Anonymous said...

more solder for more fascist imperialist wars

 
At 11 July, 2005 10:56, Anonymous Paulie said...

Okay,

Now Ive been reading about Operation Yellow elephant for a few weeks now and although I am want to go make some noise. Would it be possible to list or have a thread to post College Republican Events around the country by region. I know of many young professional former protest monkeys that would love to set up shop and even coordinate with local recruiting offices in the NY/LI area.

Also, copyright that logo and sell some T-Shirts/merchandise brother. Make some scratch for yourself or donate it, I dont care.

Please help the motivated
JC General enlist me!

 
At 11 July, 2005 15:03, Blogger banana said...

"Many right wing women need to join, too. Since they are indifferent concerning the single mothers and married women with children who have already died in Iraq, we must remind them that raising a family is no barrier to going to Iraq to be blown up. They have a patriotic duty to ship the kids to grandma and go."


Amen!! I couldn't put it any better than that!!
So are you drafting up recruiting flyers to deliver to all the right wing girls at their churches?

 
At 11 July, 2005 22:12, Anonymous sue said...

we can also remind them they can have abortions and adopt bush's precious stem cell babies when they get back

 
At 15 July, 2005 16:57, Anonymous Anonymous said...

WHEN WE GET ATTACKED HERE IT WILL BE LIKE MADRID AND THE PEOPLE WILL RISE UP AND SAY BUCK FUSH AND WELL GET NEW PROGRESSIVE LEADERSHIP FOR THE FUTURE AND HAVE PEACE FINALLY

 
At 12 August, 2010 21:06, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Blue topaz ring will certainly be thpmas sabo your best option if you are intended to thomas sabo jewellery include a ring into your gemstone jewelry collection. cheap thomas sabo charms Either if you wish to wear the ring on a special occasion or thomas bracelets wear this sort of ornaments on a daily basis, silver charm carriers it is up to your account. Blue thomas sabo necklaces topaz ring can ensure you that you will attract every person.

 

Post a Comment

<< Home